The economic downturn left deep financial wounds in many families. The young investments bankers of Wall Street may be buying their first Bentleys but often the average American has not recovered enough to buy a new Kia. Clients I work with often select mediation as their vehicle to divorce because is cost-effective. Frankly mediation is …
I have read the advice column “Dear Abby” since I was a teenager. Over the years I have noticed many trends and categories of letters and themes; love, unrequited love, disappointments, loss, etc. In the last years more letters appear addressing the issues of aging parents. How to encourage- or force- them to move out …
I recently met for the first time with a divorcing couple who were mediating a divorce settlement and also a custody plan for their children. With rare exceptions new divorce clients with children always state within the first three minutes of meeting “We only want to do what is best for our children.” Or “Our …
Every mediator has a different style and tone. In divorce or separation mediation sessions I focus on the outcome and I attempt to mold discussions to be helpful and progressive. I never ask why a couple is separating. It simply does not matter legally, unless of course a crime has been committed or there are …
I was sorting old notes for shredding and I came across notes from a case I chose not to mediate. A few years ago I met with a gentleman who was interested in mediation for a divorce. He was organized, well groomed and dressed, spoke eloquently and was charming. I asked him if the divorce …
He was a bull of a man. Tall, muscled, clearly tightly wound. He preferred to stand during the mediation. He reminded me of a peacock as he preened and strutted. She was quiet, folded into herself, clearly once a very beautiful woman. She had aged and appeared tired and worn out. They were married 30 …
Divorce can be a terrifying and confusing process. Everyone has an opinion as to what are the best options for you to pursue. Should you try to mediate first, retain an attorney immediately, move out, stay put together in the same house? Empty out joint bank accounts, take only half the funds? Everyone has a …
I am always very cautious my blog posts details are vague enough so clients do not recognize themselves or feel their privacy has been violated or a trust broken.I met with these clients over a year ago and I will not identify the parents as either Mom or Dad, simply as parents. I also will …
I recently attended a lovely wedding of a couple in their mid twenties. At the reception one of the groomsmen’s toasts to the couple caught me completely by surprise. He toasted the bride and groom that they might enjoy many happy years together, just had their parents have enjoyed. “You two are the only couple …
When a server narrates a special entrée or a featured dish but does not state the price I have an internal cringe moment. “How much does it cost?” I want to ask but I dread asking. My younger daughter just got her first job. I asked her what she would be paid and I saw …